I had the most difficult time getting myself to finish a take-home midterm recently. All together, it probably took me around 6 hours to complete. But those 6 hours were spread out over 24. It took me hours just to get myself going in the first place. Then I couldn't get myself to focus and write for long periods of time. Work came in spurts and bursts. I knew how important this was and that late work was not acceptable, so I forced myself to finish it. I kept myself up until indecent hours to ensure I did the work in time. I ended up getting around 3 hours of sleep (between 6 and 9 am) and then polished off the writing, ate a little and went to my first class that started at noon.
«That's just ridiculous! Late-nighters are a part of college life, but the time was there to get the work done in a reasonable time.»
Don't I know it. I couldn't (or wouldn't, maybe) focus on the task at hand. I found all sorts of things to distract me and occupy my valuable time. I've always had trouble getting started writing and at least I liked the subject I was working on (social movements and social change). It's getting pretty ridiculous and maybe I'm being to lax with myself. Or it's the fact that I graduate in May, have senior-itis, and just want to done with it all. (Maybe.) I'll need to deal with this in some way, because in the Real World ™ I'll need to work on finishing tasks in a timely matter that I maybe don't like or that don't intrinsically motivate me.
«What to do?»
On that note, I think I'm gonna be looking into meditation to help clear my mind and develop better focus. Not to go all hard core, but dabble in it a bit to complement what I already have going. I need to spend less time thinking about the past and the future, and deal with what's right in front of me. I think there will lots of benefit for me in using meditation.
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1 comment:
Neh neh, you don't really get it. You just think you do.
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